The Sexiness of Pregnancy

Ok so this all started in my head last night.. what exactly is it that makes pregnancy sexy because I am failing to see it here.

*First your boobs grow tremendously ok thats kinda hot..

*Then you spend however many hours puking your brains out..

*You start gaining weight...

*Hair starts growing where?!?! Tell me why I have a happy trail now too.. luckily faint and blonde.. however.. Kenny was able to notice it... From boobs to HELLO..

*Then there is gas.. wtf.. Either I have a crazy uncomfortable bubble in my chest or burping like I just drank a 6 pack..not to mention other gassy places.. and yeah that was definately a first for me that I can ever remember... How embarrassing.. Im sure my face was red and NOT from laughter..

*Your boobs are not only huge and painful.. but now leaking what feels like the texture of maple syrup..

*You have to make sure you dont laugh, sneeze or cough with a full bladder..rushing to the bathroom first thing in the morning cuz lil one is now squeezing your bladder like a squeeky toy... there is always the possibility of peeing on yourself.

*Not only are you now leaking from literally every hole in your body, extra sweat, saliva, maple syrup from your boobs, but oh what's this.. Just when you think hey I dont have my period anymore lets throw away the pads.. yeah.. time to break out the panty liners because what do you know.. Yeah.. thats leaking too!

So please.. tell me... what am I missing about any of the above being sexy?
If sexy is walking around in a 9 month, hairy, liquid excreting, gassy, fat suit let me know Im sure I can win some sort of a crowned title.

Or maybe it's sexy cuz duhhh it's a sign you put out!